I survived the great outdoors. I plan on providing a full account soon, but in the meantime I will share with you some of the “unwritten” rules of camping that I learned on my trip.
-While one of the pleasures in camping for a man is to pee in the great outdoors, apparently (according to the manager that yelled at me) the Walmart parking lot is not considered to be part of the great outdoors.
-Forcibly propelling one’s elbow into the gut of another in order to secure the last marshmallow is considered gauche, especially if you have wandered into a stranger’s campsite.
-It seems scaring one’s fellow campers with that creeping story of the guy with the hook is acceptable behavior; yet getting revenge on the guy that creeped you out with that story by putting a scorpion in his hiking boots is inexplicably considered inappropriate.
-Dragging the guy sunbathing in the Speedo towards the lake while yelling, “Help! He’s beached, and can’t breathe!” is a form of humor that will go largely unappreciated. And yet, somehow, receiving a bathing-suit-net wedgie from an angry Speedo wearer is guaranteed to illicit laughter from the entire beach.
Just my thoughts,