Monday, September 11, 2006

IRRELEVANT

This essay was written in the fall of 2001 for publication in Transposition: The Journal of the Christian Performing Artist's Fellowship.

It was a several days after. We had spent two days glued to the television, unable to turn away from the visual barrage of the tragedy, perhaps as a reflection of the psychic barrage that we knew we couldn’t close our eyes to. We then spent time in that emotional blank wall, systems shutting down from overload. But our leaders said to get back to work. So we tried that.

And that’s when I found my wife, sitting on our bed crying. And I understood why she cried. How could we go back to work when our work seemed so irrelevant?

We are artists. Not firemen, policemen, paramedics, doctors or nurses. Not National Guardsman, Marines, Army engineers, construction workers or Red Cross Volunteers. We are artists. And not just any artists, but the silly kind. My wife is an actress, dreaming of being a cartoon voice someday. And I was in the middle of writing a video script about a vegetable who wants to be a superhero. We were entertainers. And what is the relevance of art, of entertainment, after September 11th?

The question isn’t a new one, just new to us. Out of the misery of captivity, the Psalmist writes in Psalm 137:

“By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept when we remembered Zion. There on the poplars we hung our harps, for there our captors asked us for songs, our tormentors demanded songs of joy; they said, ‘Sing us one of the songs of Zion!’ How can we sing the songs of the Lord while in a foreign land?”

How can we perform in a tragedy laden land?

Of course some art made itself immediately relevant. The doleful music played under the montages of images from ground zero, putting to language what words could not. The overtaxed bagpipers, culling a universal mourning from specific funeral after funeral. The brilliant, lonely line of Taps, a singular call of remembrance for individuals forever united by one date.

And then there was the art giving solace to those involved in the rescue operation, and those facing the reality of their personal losses. We all heard of William Harvey from Juilliard, and how he went to the armory housing the relief workers. There he played what he could recall of Tchaikovsky, Vivaldi, Dvorak and many others. His story moves us, because he saw the unexpected yet undeniable value that the music gave to those whose souls needed such a gift.

And what of those who aren’t in New York or Washington, to lend comfort to those in those cities? And what again of those suffering who are not at ground zero? An entire nation and beyond was hit by that tragedy. An entire nation and beyond looked for healing.

And so art was given. We sang along with CNN as a national prayer service was held. We listened in on a concert, reaching out to our brothers and sisters by sharing their song. We substituted “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” with “God Bless America” at the seventh inning stretch. And there was the art that immediately called the nation together. The patriotic murals, giving messages of unity and support along with shared loss. Ray Charles singing “America, the Beautiful,” allowing us to lift tearstained cheeks to the sky with pride.

Garrison Keillor led me in a good, yet much needed catharsis when he sang Tom Paxton’s homage to the New York rescuers, The Bravest. (“Now every time I try to sleep, I'm haunted by the sound, Of firemen pounding up the stairs, While we were coming down.”)

As an ex-New Yorker trapped three thousand miles from the city I love, I looked to David Lettermen on his return to the air. He broadcasts from New York; I knew he would understand. But his is a show of entertainment, and he started his show by echoing my own thoughts: How can entertainment be relevant? But Mr. Letterman returned to work as he was told, not understanding how or if his work had a place in the new world.

He started out speaking his own personal thoughts on the events, his own anger and grief. There was no band, no jokes, just a bare, exposed entertainer. He then comforted Dan Rather, a professional who was allowed for maybe the first time to cry over a story he lived twenty-four/seven. Next came an interview with fellow New Yorker Regis Philbin. And David did the unthinkable. He made fun of Regis. And Regis responded with an equal barb.

And the nation laughed.

Tentative, sure. But we laughed. And with that little, trivial laugh, we began to heal. It was okay to laugh; it was okay to cry. Incompatible, inconsistent, absurd: an entertainer let us transcend the moment by fully being in the moment.

Art has a way of doing that – speaking to us in ways that we neither understand, nor could describe. Especially in times when art seems most irrelevant. In The Liberated Imagination, Leland Ryken asserts, “When our humanity is in danger, the artistic spirit suddenly lives.” When the Titanic sank, the musicians onboard chose to spend their final moments playing – for themselves, and for their fellow passengers. The loss of death is often confronted with music, whether from the Irish tradition of keening or the more organized New Orleans dirge/celebration of the march to and from the graveyard.

This should not surprise us, I suppose. We’ve always known that art can be transcendent, a vehicle for speaking the language of the soul. In his essay “Art, Faith and Stewardship,” Gregory Wolfe reminds us, “Art, like religious faith in general and prayer in particular, has the power to help us transcend the fragmented society we inhabit.” In times of extraordinary emotion, we need an extraordinary language – the language of art, a language of meaning.

Madeleine L’Engle opens her book Walking on Water: Reflections on Faith and Art by reminding us of Leonard Bernstein’s idea that music is cosmos (harmony, order) out of chaos. Surely our world is one of chaos; a theory made all the more practical since September 11th. Yet just as surely, within the chaos is the cosmos of a mourning Father and an understanding Son. In her book, Madeleine L’Engle builds the argument that art affirms meaning, especially within tragedy. She decisively asserts, “Art is an affirmation of life, a rebuttal of death.”

And this is because art always says more than what it seems to say. Art is not just about the moment – the laughter of the second, or the sorrow/glory of an instant. But all true art reflects the salvation of the chaos, the cosmos coming to the earth. Raymond Chandler, in The Simple Art of Murder, states, “In everything that can be called art there is a quality of redemption.” Think of the song that has led more funeral marches in the past days than any other, Amazing Grace. The message is more than one of mourning, but one of rejoicing as well. “I once was lost, but now am found.” The universal message, only truly understood with the haunting melody that accompanies the words.

And that is the wonder of transporting art, whether the art of laughter or of tears. It is timeless. It is not just art for the moment, but it puts the moment into a past and a future. Why would a violinist’s rendition of Vivaldi have meaning to a weary rescue worker? Because it speaks to that worker’s weariness of the moment; because it reminds that worker of the life prior to the tragedy; because it shows the hope of the future when the tragedy is part of the past. Why did David Letterman’s show mean so much to a mourning nation? Because it lifted our mourning up – neither dismissing nor wallowing; because it reminded us of who we once were when we were whole; and because it brought the joy of knowing who we are yet to be.

How can we sing the Lord’s song in a foreign land? Because that song gives language to our mourning. Because that song transcends our tears. Because that song lifts our cheeks up to the sky. Because that song reminds of the hope to come. Because even in our grieving, God tells us, “I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt, O Virgin Israel. Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful.” (Jeremiah 31:4)

And so my wife and I once again sing.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Inside the Writer’s Studio

I have been asked to get people to watch Happy Hour tonight.

To be honest, I know nothing about the show, its content or quality. All I know is that my friend Sean is working on the show, he thinks its funny, and he wants to keep working.

Not just for the paycheck (and knowing the pay for his position, you may take the word “just” out of the preceding clause), but for the work place environment. In his words,

Because I love it here. It's hard to imagine a better work environment. Everybody is awesome, from the writers to the production staff to the other peons. And we have the offices once occupied by Seinfeld. They're located next to a fake suburban street with a fake park and a fake fountain. And it has balconies. On one of the balconies, I'm growing sunflowers. And all these awesome little kids are running around everywhere. And everybody's pregnant.

“I'm thinking about becoming pregnant myself, strictly out of peer pressure. And there are sweet blue bikes that we cruise around on and there's an inflatable basketball hoop and there's a monkey.”

How can any workplace with a monkey be bad?

So tune in tonight, and help Sean save his balcony sunflowers.

Just my thoughts,

The Other Sean

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Early Verdict: Prison Break


(Warning: Due to its dealing with violence and violent offenders, this show isn’t for everyone.)

One liner: Fox drama about a man framed for murder, and the brother that risks everything to save him from the chair.

Beyond the spin: The show enters its sophomore year with us all wondering – “Can a prison break show still work without the prison?”

Truth be told: Without a doubt.

These guys continue to amaze me. I thought for sure that they would break their promise and find a way to keep the guys behind bars for another season or two. But they did indeed break out at the end of last season; and, man, the tension has not stopped.

The skinny: This show gets its on-the-edge-of-your-seat thrills honestly; the story telling is simple (although the story is complex – Wilder would have loved this show). The conspiracy angle is mysterious, and yet not so overwrought as to lose one’s will to bother.

And the show has heart galore.

Name another show that has the audience rooting for the convicts to get away, all the while praying that they get caught?

A show that has you cheer as the hero succeed in getting what they want, but makes your soul ponder whether it was really worth the cost? (Dr. Sara – my heart aches for you.)

A show that has a scene where nothing happens but a man getting into a car and calling OnStar for directions – and yet still be chilling? (C.S. Lewis says “Whatever in a work of art is not used, is doing harm.” No harm being done by this show’s writers.)

If you’ve missed the first few shows, head over to Fox’s webpage – they let you watch them online for free.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Early Verdicts: Vanished


One liner: Fox drama about a Senator’s wife gone missing.

Beyond the spin: Wants to be 24 combined to Without a Trace, throwing in the mystery and conspiracies of Lost and Alias.

Truth be told: Doesn’t have the drive of 24, or the human interest of Without a Trace, or the heart of Lost, or the costumes-you-can-kick-butt-in of Alias.

The skinny: Three episodes in, and it already feels like they are making up stuff just to create mystery. The conspiracy plot points seem contrived and counter-productive to the powers behind the curtain.

Remember in the first season of 24, when you found out that they only had the first 12 eps fully mapped out, so the actions of the villains didn’t make sense if you compared the last half of the season to the first? Now imaging 24 doing that in the second episode…

Why you really don’t want to watch: Despite some fun and a little bit of interest (Ming Na as a FBI agent – works for me), it tries too hard with too little. Plus, the lead hunk (Agent Kelton) has yet to find an ounce of charisma in the role, and the show has two of 24’s Kims – the senator’s children whose sole function is to do stupid things that get them in trouble to spike the intensity, without ever doing one thing that makes you care if they got their foot stuck in a wolf trap.

I’ve moved on.

How about you?

Just my thoughts,

Sean

ps For an idea of how exciting Fox thinks the show is, the above picture is the most action filled one on their website.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Blind Dating In L.A.

My short film, The Importance of Blind Dating, is an Official Selection of the LA SHORTS FEST.

Wahoo!

Now those that have only drooled over the news that is won the Audience Award at the Flatland Film Fest can do something about it!

You can come see it Saturday, September 9th. It is part of PROGRAM #48, at 12:45 pm, and the Arc Light Cinemas (Theatre 13).

For more info and to order your tickets, go to www.lashortsfest.com

Just my thoughts,

Sean

p.s. The pics are from the shoot.

Act One Opry Style

If you know of anyone in Nashville interested in writing for Hollywood, send them this away.

Act One: Writing for Hollywood is holding a weekend seminar September 15th and 16th. Act One is THE premiere writing program in L.A., and this a perfect way to get a taste of the talent training the next (and current) generation of film and television writers.

-Sean

Sunday, September 03, 2006

September 3, 1963

For me, I think it’s birthdays.

For Charlie Brown, it was Christmas and Valentine’s that was hard to get through.

But with the group holidays, you can at least find someone else in the same boat, someone blue in the season of red and green, or alone in the season of togetherness, or stuck with a bag of rocks in the season of sugar-induced comas.

Birthdays are so focused, so zeroed in. You and you alone have to take the heat and focus of your special day. And that can be great or sour; and even when great, can be a bit too much.

And they are supposed to be milestones – which means either they succeed, which can be depressing (hence the black balloons when turning thirty) or are they fail to be special. Which is equally depressing, considering it is your special day.

It is my special day that prompts reminders that Hollywood is a town only for the young.

It was my birthday (what was it, thirteen?) when I was old enough to understand why I would have to wait for the end-of-the-month paycheck before getting a present.

Two years in a row, my college Christian group threw a surprise party, only to forget to invite me. One of those has an amusing ending – remind to tell you about it someday.

Ah, birthdays. Guaranteed joy.

Today is my brother Chris’ birthday.

Chris’ special day was always a tough one on all of us. It always coincided with Labor Day – the marker that school starts next week. Chris celebrates, then WHAM - we’re all back in the nine month prison system.

You have to understand that for kidlets, the year begins in September. Sorry, January First, but you are irrelevant to the younger generation. Nope, the true marker is the first day of school, the start of a harsh winter (there is little Harvest joy for fourth graders) that won’t end until robins sing.

So Chris’ b-day is the last hurrah, the last sign of freedom.

Of course, time changes everything. Now that the sibs are older, Labor Day is the sign that their kids are going to school, so I suppose it is a marker of impeding freedom – the kind of freedom that comes in daytime chunks.

No matter how it was seen in past years, it is different now.

Christmas and the group holidays won’t be so bad. Sure, he’ll be missed (I actually got to spend last Christmas with him, the first time in a long, long while). But there are other distractions along with his absence, other people that share Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter.

And here we are at the start of the harsh winter.

Why was there never a Charlie Brown Birthday special? Mr. Schultz, you left us equipped for every holiday but the solo one; you left us too soon. There is no Great Pumpkin or Easter Beagle to bring comfort. No popcorn and toast meal or little red-haired girl to distract us.

No tree to resurrect.

All I have is a nickel, and a sack of memories, present regrets and past delights. Perhaps the doctor is in.

Happy birthday, Chris. I hope your party is pure joy this year.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Friday, September 01, 2006

My Brother's a Bast - I Better Not Finish This Title

My brother Luke is part of the 3-2 K company, affectionately known as the "Betio Bastards" -- a nickname earned during WWII.

Despite the appellation, not all of his work is swear worthy. Here is a link to some of his groups latest actions.

God bless, Luke.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Ten Tips for Scripts

First, let's all revel in the notion that we are about to take advice from a guy who doesn't have an agent, and has yet to make a show hit network television, or a movie hit a theatre.

So, are we done revelling?

Alrighty then. Here are my tips to folks from out of town who are trying to get someone in the industry to read their scripts.

1. First understand that virtually everyone that hasn’t had a million dollar movie in the past two years has the same problem. No real sure-fire ways to get this done, but maybe some things that make it slightly easier.

2. Make sure that the screenplay is formatted correctly, and free of typos and grammar/spelling errors. A misformatted script tells the reader that you haven’t invested the time into the script – so why should they? For formatting questions, check out Christopher Riley’s The Hollywood Standard.

3. Make sure the first ten pages are really exciting and are page turners. Most of these guys do not have time to read all of every script, so the first ten help them decide whether they should keep going. A lot of successful movies have slow openings – but that doesn’t help them to get read.

4. Be able to pitch your screenplay in a compelling way in five minutes, two minutes, and one sentence. Practice the pitch. If you can get thirty seconds with a producer, and you can intrigue them with the pitch, they are more likely to read the screenplay. Many places will want you to send a written pitch before looking at a screenplay.

5. Get an agent. Yeah, yeah, not as easy as it sounds. But many production companies, and virtually every studio, will not look at an unsolicited manuscript unless coming from an agent that is a signatory with the Writer’s Guild.

6. Attend writing conferences, screenwriting conferences, and film festivals. Go to the panels, and try to get yourself introduced to people that work for the people that you want to read your script.

7. Get to know other writers. Sometimes a writer will pass on your screenplay to his/her agent or producer friends.

8. Be patient. Imagine trying to read, literally, several thousand screenplays a year. This is how Tom Hanks and Mel Gibson live their lives – it is impossible, and thus, to protect themselves and allow time to do things like act, direct and produce, it is hard (if not impossible) to get the script to them. But you might be able to get it to a guy that works with a guy that works with the company that works with Playtone or Icon.

9. Get a short film made, and get it on the web and in festivals. Capitalize on any awards or exposure it gets by sending postcards to the agents or producers that you want to read your full length script.

10. Pray – for wisdom, discernment, and especially that you don’t confuse secular success with G-d’s will.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Making the Band

DanBuck said...

Old friend. Help me out. I've got a great idea for a show and want to begin writing it as a collaboration with a friend. He's enthusiastic but wants some assurances it might get considered by someone who could actually do something with it.

Neither of us is in L.A.

Am I living in a fantasy world? I don't mind being a long shot, but a little wisdom in this matter goes a long way.

Should we need to pitch first or write first?

Dan

Dear Dan,

You are living in a fantasy world.

But then again, living in a fantasy world is a requirement for writers, so that may not be a bad thing.

First off, if you want to make it in Hollywood, you should be in Hollywood. If you can’t get yourself motivated to move the wife and kidlets on a whim, then take the first step of applying to Act One: Writing for Hollywood, and plan on being here for just one month.

(Act One may well be the BEST writing program for film and television short of a full Master’s program; and it is designed specifically for Christians.)

As to needing assurance that your flick will be considered by someone who can do something, that is easy. There are two ways to do this:

One: Be commissioned to write it, with a paycheck in hand before you start writing. All that takes in Hollywood is being on the top of the food chain, which only takes twenty or so years of work and an incredible amount of talent and luck – on average. Right now, all ten of those spots are filled, but they don’t last, so one should be opening up soon. Good luck with that.

Oh, and being commissioned in no way guarantees your work will be produced. We know that from the playwriting world. I had an upfront check to write a Broadway sized musical, and even got it workshopped. Now it sits in a box next to my desk. Hey, if anyone out there wants a musical of H.G. Wells’ The Invisible Man, give me a holler.

Two: Be related to a person who has the power to make projects happen, and be on their good side so much they can’t say no to you. It’s probably too late for you to be born in that situation. If your wife is really understanding, you can divorce her and take a shot at marrying a Bryce or a Sophia. (On the Christian understanding that you will re-marry your spouse after your movie gets made.)

Okay, now that I have tricked you into believing that breaking in is easy, I will follow up later today (or tomorrow) with my ten tips for how to get your script read.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Road to Nower: Part 4 – I, the Camera

So at this point Joel and I have an idea and a setting. We began to brainstorm, populating our world with characters, relationships and histories.

And soon we had to make an important decision – one that would effect the direction and marketability of our project: one camera or three.

A little background for those not in the biz: half-hour television comedies come in two flavors, single-camera and three-camera.

Single-camera shows are taped using – wait, let me do the math—right, one camera. They are shot like films, shooting from one angle, resetting the camera, and shooting the same scene from another angle.

These shows are not shot in front of an audience, and have more flexibility with locations, outdoor scenes, and quicker, shorter scenes. Examples are Scrubs and The Office.

Three-camera shows are taped using – wait, let me do the math – right, four cameras. Okay, math doesn’t work here, but I’ll explain that later.

This was a technique developed by Desi Arnez for the I Love Lucy shows. Desi, a brilliant man, realized that the constant stopping and resetting of cameras interrupted the flow of his talented wife, and made it harder to recapture the energy that made her so popular in their live shows.

Three cameras shooting different angles at the same time and a live audience solved that problem, and helped to make Lucille Ball the superstar of television. It also set the standard for sit-coms (situation comedies), which until recently were predominately three-camera shows (examples include Everybody Loves Raymond and Friends).

(Side note: the studios did not want Desi to play Lucy’s husband, figuring that the American public would not accept a mixed marriage on television. The couple toured a version of their show, selling out across the nation and proving the suits wrong – and thus earning Desi his place in front of the camera.)

Oh, about the fourth camera: you can thank Robin Williams for that. Seriously, thank him – he is responsible for supporting the careers of one fourth of the cameramen in television.

You see, when Mork and Mindy was airing, the manic Williams kept popping out of frame, so the producers put in a fourth camera to do nothing but follow him around. The idea caught on, and it became standard for three-camera sit-coms to have a fourth, floating camera.

Perhaps to easiest way to describe the difference between the two types of shows is in the feel. Single-camera shows feel more like watching film; three-camera shows feel more like watching live theatre.

The more we developed our show (tentatively called Hollywood Heartland at the time), the more it started to feel like a three-camera show. But these days, single-camera shows are all the rage, and there is a sentiment out there that triples were unfunny, too old-fashioned, and past their prime.

So, armed with that information, we made the only sensible choice.

We decided to make it a three-camera sit-com.

Next: Two More Decisions Guaranteeing the Demise of our Show

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Good Night

When my godson, Isaac, was little, his dad was an officer in the United States Navy.

One night, Isaac insisted on kissing daddy before going to sleep. This broke my sister’s heart, as there was no way to kiss daddy – he was far out to sea, and wouldn’t return for weeks. She tried to explain this to her young son.

But Isaac continued to insist, ignoring my sister’s logic about time and space. Isaac would not close his eyes until he went and kissed daddy.

Finally, hoping for divine intervention, Patty told her son that he could go look for daddy himself.

Isaac raced from his bed, went immediately to the chest where the photo of his father in his dress uniform sat, pulled down the frame and kissed it.

He replaced the picture, raced back to bed, and contentedly closed his eyes.

This became the nightly ritual, created by a boy whose love far away, but not too far. A boy that understood the illogic of love and time and space.

But that was a long time ago (the above picture was taken in 1990).

Life has moved forward, and everything is different now. Andy, Isaac’s daddy, is no longer in the military; Isaac is now a man himself, and studying at the Air Force Academy.

The picture below of Isaac’s cousin, Elena, was taken less than a month ago.

Elena’s daddy is an officer in the United States Marine Corps, and is currently serving his tour of duty in Iraq.

Elena would like to kiss her daddy good night, but the logic of time and space…

This is her ritual – pat daddy’s picture.

Life has moved forward, and everything is different now…

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Monday, August 28, 2006

"Hood"ies Across the Pond

For those of you following my friend Cory's movie, he is now in England doing Hoodwinked promos.

Be sure to check his site regularly for updates on his cross-cultural adventures.

In honor of the upcoming opening, I found a poster in the native language of Britain! (It was an exhaustive search -- but then again, I tire easy.)

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Middle of Nower: Part Three – Small Town Ideas

So Joel has an idea – a one-line idea that seems to have potential.

Joel and I work well together for a number of reasons. We are honest with each other – crucial for our craft to improve. We can take honesty from each other – crucial if we are to keep from crumbling into sobbing puddles during each session.

Also, we agree a lot on what moves us, tickles us, and what we respect in writing.

Another added benefit for this particular project – we both know small towns.

You see, that idea of Joel’s goes like this: After a failed project, a Hollywood producer is forced to live in a small town.

Pretty complex, huh?

So Joel and I started by reminiscing about our small town experiences. I grew up in a village (thank you, Union Springs, for being such a fertile ground for tiny town stories!); and Joel continued his town affiliations throughout adulthood in touring and summer stock.

So we talked about the controversy that tore a town apart – whether putting a stop light on main street was the same as giving in to decadent modern culture.

We talked about the guy that everyday would sit on the hood of his truck, watching downtown from nine to five, and then head home.

We talked about the town in the middle of nowhere that after the factory closed decided to save itself by becoming a tourist destination.

We talked about the lady at the bank that knows way too much about everybody’s everything.

And in these preliminary conversations, we came to a few conclusions.

One: Small towns are funny.

Two: Small towns are full of funny people.

Three: We like small towns.

Whatever world we were going to develop, no matter how much fun we were going to have, we would ultimately respect and honor these people.

Next: What's the Matter With Comedy These Days

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Funny Bunny

Ever feel resentment because someone got a reward that you deserved?

Yeah, me too.

Check out Jennifer's blog.

Then this picture will make sense.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Footprints Washed Away in the Sand

Do you think G-d thinks of us as whiny?

Catherine and I were walking on the beach in Hawaii (oh, did I mention that Catherine and I got to go to Hawaii?).

There was a couple walking ahead of us; she was closer to the water than he was. Every once in a while, a wave would come up and wash away her tracks. The tracks looked funny – as if one of the walkers disappeared every now and again.

That made us think of the old “footprints in the sand story.”

You know the one, where the guy dreams that he looks back on his life, and there are footprints in the sand – his and Jesus’. He realizes that one set of footprints disappears at times, and he accuses Jesus of abandoning him during his rough years.

The Lord responds by saying, “No, those were the times I carried you.”

Looking at our Hawaii beach prints, I imagined the story shifting slightly, with me in it.

Instead of accusing, I get all misty-eyed (having seen the story on a hundred plaques through his life), and say, “Ah, look where there is only one set of prints. You must have carried me then.”

And Jesus replies, “I don’t think so, Einstein. The waves just washed away one set of prints. I never carried you. I let you lean on me, and pulled through with you, and I never left your side as you weaved like a drunken sailor, but brother you walked the whole way.”

And I gripe, “But I thought you were the nice guy that would never make me struggle if I didn’t want to!”

And Jesus would reply, “Seriously, if you want someone to carry you, first you’re going to have to lay off the donuts. And second, find a god that doesn’t care so much about you. Remember that suffering produces perseverance, which develops character, which leads to hope? You want me to deny you hope just so you can piggy back when the sand starts feeling hot on your tender little toesies? Grow up.”

Okay, he probably wouldn’t be all that snotty to me.

But he might be tempted.

Just my thoughts,

Sean

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

The Road to Nower: Part Two – The Project

Now this will be hard for some of y’all to believe, but there are people working on projects in Hollywood that have absolutely nothing to do with me. Why anyone would want to work on a venture that I am not part of is a blog for another day.

One such person is Joel, my Death and Taxes co-author; and one such project of his (among many, many projects) was directing and co-writing the musical Fellowship! This hilarious spoof on the Peter Jackson Lord of the Rings movie is so entertaining that I actually paid to see it several times.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am willing to see friend’s work multiple times, as long as it doesn’t require any outlay on my part. It has to be good before I start shelling out the dough – I may be a friend, just not that good of a friend.

Fellowship! not only garnered the L.A. Weekly Best Musical of the Year award, it was a sold-out crowd pleaser every place it played.

And Grammnet is working with Joel in getting the little show to New York.

Not long after our pitch of Death and Taxes to them, Joel was hanging with the Grammies (hmmm, I wonder if they hate being called that) talking Fellowship! business. He was reminded of how much they enjoyed the pitch, and the sorrow at not being able to sell it.

Now the folks at Grammnet are whip-smart, and they know the biz called Show. (They are behind the hit Medium. Most shows follow a simple formula: let the actors be pretty and the story be cute. Medium allows the actors to be grounded characters and the stories to be smart. Risky in its simplicity.)

Joel, realizing that he has the ear of the whip and the smart, takes the opening and asks point blank for help in finding a show that the biz might not only find funny, but also sellable. Joel threw a handful of ideas out there, and the Gramma (hmmm, I bet they would hate being called that too) pointed out one that he thought would sell – the one sentence that would eventually evolve into Middle of Nower.

Now all Joel had to do was take his one sentence pitch, and create the story to go with it.

I would have to come up with another name for people that work at Grammnet. (Grammnetians? Ooh, rhymes with… Oh, never mind.)

Next: The Idea Becomes Fleshy

Just my thoughts,

Sean

PS Medium is a show about a, well, medium. If you don’t like shows about mediums, one need not read tea leaves to know that this show may not be your cup of tea.

Quote of the Moment


We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

--Aristotle

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Two Great Tastes...

Forget about chocolate and peanut butter, what happens when you put Star Trek and Monty Python together?

You get this.

Just my amusements,

Sean

The Road to Nower: Part One -- The Partner

It all began with a completely different project.

Thom Deason was interning at Grammnet, and knew they were looking for family comedies. He was the producer on a short film script of mine that never quite got made, but thought that maybe that short could be turned into a TV pilot.

That wasn’t a completely new thought. While we were still trying to get it made as a short, the directors involved (Drew Sachs and Karen Lund) had made a similar suggestion. But it wouldn’t be easy.

The short was about a guy that is trying to commit suicide; but a bumbling employee of death accidentally convinces him that life is really worth living. (Ironic, given my past year, no?)

What it became was a sit-com about an I.R.S. agent that prevents his own accidental death by agreeing to work with a bumbling agent in the Death Department of the bureaucracy known as The Heavens. Of course, we called it Death and Taxes (thank you, Lauri).

But there was a little problem. I had never written a sit-com before.

I had written plenty of comedic plays, musical comedies, hilarious children’s videos, and a number of one-hour dramas that had comedy in them. In fact, my Monk spec script was garnering awards, and readers of my West Wing thought I matched the wit of Aaron Sorkin (which was generous – I fooled people into thinking I matched the wit of Aaron, which was good enough for me).

I think of myself as a rather humorous writer.

But three jokes a page? Not the style I’m used to.

So I took the script to Joel McCrary.

Joel and I had worked together in our church’s drama team, so I knew his writing and his sense of comedy. Besides, I had written the role of the bumbling Death agent for Joel – he knew the script already.

So I asked him to read it with suggestions for upping the funny.

And his suggestions were so good – and so true to the story – that I took it further and asked him to co-write with me.

We rewrote the pilot together, developed and practiced the pitch, and took it to Grammnet. And they loved it!

Which means both diddly and squat in this town. As much as they liked it, they couldn’t figure out how they would sell the network on a sit-com about Death moving into the basement of an IRS agent’s home. And so our sit-com died at pitch stage.

Next: Life After Death (and Taxes).

Just my thoughts,

Sean